So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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