Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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