Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
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