we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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