Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
