Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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