I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize