Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Randomize