I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
