Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Randomize
