My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
