just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
It's rum buckets o'clock
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize