I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I won't apologize to a one balled man
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
