I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
i came on her dog
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
