Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
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