The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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