so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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