i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
