I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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