The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
