Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Semen is not good for contacts.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
whose ass print is on the piano?
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
