Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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