the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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