..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
