Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
pray to the hookup gods
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
