It's like God shit irony all over that family
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
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