week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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