I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
