Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
