it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Randomize
