some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Randomize
