I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
