I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
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