Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
