I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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