Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
its liver damage thursday
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