i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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