I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize