she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
