google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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