was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
