I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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