it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
she pinky promised me she was 18
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
