the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
