she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
