I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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