I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
