you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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