I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Randomize
