K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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