In the future we'll all be gay
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Randomize
